Just when I think I have a grasp of God’s love for me, He shows me more love. I’ve always known that God loves me, “for the Bible tells me so.” Did I really understand His love completely? No! Many years of my life were wasted thinking I had to earn Jesus’ love. I had to do everything right and never mess up to receive God’s love and favor. What is the misconception here? Jesus’ love is not a love that can be earned like some human love. It is a gift He gives freely, no matter what!!!
Last year I went to a counselor to talk about issues that were holding me back in my life. I discovered that the root of my problem was love. I witnessed love through human eyes. With human eyes, I saw me trying so desperately to earn other people’s love. That, my friends, is a losing battle!! I worked so hard at earning love that I had no love for myself. With no love for myself, along with the misunderstanding of God’s love, I led a miserable life.
I couldn’t live like these anymore. I had to change a few things:
1. Discover the depth of God’s love for me. He died for me to live.
2. Learn to love myself. If Jesus loved me and cared about me enough to died, who am I not to love myself.
3. Learn how to truly love others. No matter the faults, past mistakes, current sin, I cannot judge. I must keep my eye on the soul that Jesus loves as much as He loves me.
After allowing these lessons to flood my heart, soul, and spirit, I began to live. It changed my life in such a way that I began to take baby steps of faith. I began to ask boldly for things I desired. I started by making myself transparent, allowing all of my skeletons to crumble out of my closet in the book that I published, A Time to Keep and a Time to Throw Away. I wanted the world to know of my mother’s battle with cancer and how poorly I handled it. If I was to help people with their grieving, I had to let it all out so others could relate. As my desire to write a book became a reality, my faith grew stronger. I began to dream big and keep the faith until my dream came true. My prayer started with, “Lord, If my daughter asked me for a desire that was in her heart and I knew she was trying her best to achieve it, I would give it to her and God how much more do you love me?”
I literally had to break chains of incorrect thinking of Jesus and His love for me. Thinking that I was taught my whole life. I started by thinking about God and not denominations. I focused on my relationship with Jesus instead of going to hell if I didn’t do everything just right. Breaking out of the box of guilt because I couldn’t live up to what I thought God wanted, changed my life in a way that was supernatural. Please don’t misunderstand, the Bible tells us what is right and wrong and we have to stand accountable for what we choose to do. Supernatural, in my opinion, means things only God can do that we never thought possible.
My love for Jesus, my self and others grows stronger with each opportunity to step out in faith. Last Saturday, I took a leap of faith. I tried something that I never could see my self doing – ever!!!! I flew on an airplane. Some of you may be laughing because you do this all the time. Not me, I have never flown commercially and never thought I could. My courage was small but my desire was deep. Jesus says that His strength is made perfect in our weakness. My plane trip was supernatural. I discovered, yet, another level of Jesus’ love for me. This level I would have missed if I had continued listening to the enemy lies,telling me that I couldn’t fly.
God’s love never ceases to amaze me. With every occurrence of favor, knowing that I don’t deserve it, God takes me to a new depth of love. And if I let myself go, I will continue to fall into God’s love forever. Thank you, Jesus, for letting me fly safely on an airplane. I love you.